i met filo in ibiza.
we liked each other and connected.
i think it was about 9-8 years ago,
a few times it happened that i lived with him when arriving to ibiza.
with me he only gave, never asked me for nothing and always offered help, support and a hugs.
he suffered a long time from pain, then about a year ago they discovered he has cancer.
he fought it until yesterday after noon.
i feel thankful for spending some time with him in his last days in this kind of existence.
they gave him 48 hours about 10 days ago,
there are i guess situations when there is no remedy, there is no way back and there is no chance to get out of it,
it is so strange to accept it, to deny our most strong instinct to survive.
to believe that there will not be a miracle and that this is it.
to accept your exit that will always come b4 time.
i feel Filo was in between the two, he kept optimist with all of us, and i heard him say to some of us that he is going out,
jai alle a sortir,
every time i went into the hospital i took a deep breath, and did my best to be happy and cheerful.
yesterday morning i got a call to come and say good by,
i came and felt him, i was quite and then i sang a song for him so he hears.
was with him for a moment alone where i told him that i thank him so much for knowing him,
for learning from him, all this lessons including this possibly last one.
that i love him,
and that it looks to me as if we all went to this party called life, and he just had to go b4 the party was over,
and as soon as my party will be over i will be going to the exact same place he is going to,
that there is nobody that is not going there,
just some stay longer then others.
he was in between worlds, in a transit process, slowly loosing life from his body,
i asked him to let go, i wished for his soul attached to his body to let go and lift of to whatever is there or not.
it was hared for him to breath, i was after almost 2 nights without sleep.
at one point i went to the other room, and sat with the friends,
i felt i’m almost loosing it, my body giving up to the Fatigue.
then i decided to let go and close my eyes a bit,
i did , and after timeless 2 minutes, my friend woke me up and said ‘it’s over’
i got up.
i saw him.. and there was no life in his body.
looked through the window, and saw cars going, people going to parties in ibiza..
more then sad, it all felt very strange,
and another feeling that i can not find the word for.
and not sure if there is a word for it.
felt he is still there.. still around.
after some time i slowly walked out the hospital.. stopped at the edge of the hospital and found it very hared to make the step out of the premisses.
like it is a strong big step in the separation process from Filo.
the part of me that is Filo.. is there and will be there as long as i am there.
Risso’s have a relatively large anterior body and dorsal fin, while the posterior tapers to a relatively narrow tail. The bulbous head has a vertical crease in front.
Infants are dorsally gray to brown and ventrally cream-colored, with a white anchor-shaped area between the pectorals and around the mouth. In older calves, the non-white areas darken to nearly black, and then lighten (except for the always dark dorsal fin.) Linear scars mostly from social interaction eventually cover the bulk of the body. Older individuals appear mostly white. Most individuals have 2-7 pairs of teeth, all in the lower jaw.
Length is typically 10 feet (3.0 m) although specimens may reach 14.1 feet (4.3 m). Like most dolphins, males are typically slightly larger than females. This species weighs 300–500 kilograms (660–1,100 lb) making it the largest species called “dolphin”.
this is a picture image of a recently discovered new dolphin tip that is known to smile with no specific reason even on a rainy day…
it was super nice, the sea and the connection to nature.. realising through the feeling that actually this space ship is perfectly designed in an amazing way, that we do not miss anything, that all is there and in us already.
and wrinkles are our mind’s fault only..:)
comments make me vibrate more,
sharing my blog might cause an explosion of joy (for my mother..)
deep blue thank you to the team that crossed the wild sea with only.. each other to laugh with..:))
love me..love me not…
these are some of my reasons to be in ibiza..and some of my reasons…to B..!!
It was already 2 weeks ago and in this hectic way of living it looks like far away from now.
But some moments I had in Sweden will stay with me for good.
The cold was quit new for me,
It felt like it grabs you like little ants walking on your body exactly five seconds after you go out the door,
But the houses were warm, and the feeling was pleasant.
Was not possible to stay out more then 10-15 minutes.
We had one super nice sunny snowy day in the outback of Sweden, went to the Baltic sea, and saw some nature that was very different from what I knew before.
Frozen plants, and ice everywhere, in the middle of the road there is a pile of snow.
And the houses out there look like from a far away fairy tail land.
Climbed a mountain through a frozen forest.
One thing suddenly seemed strange for me is the thing with the trees getting naked in the winter..
Both man and animal cover themselves with anything they can to avoid the cold,
But our friendly trees loose all their leafs in winter time.. I wonder..?
Busses come on time; everything functions in an efficient way.
Smoking section in every bar..Is out side. And is always empty.
coming back sweden warmth pronto.. 🙂
Warmth from the heart.
i like this one.
A day and night in Prague.
On the way to Sweden and on the way back I stopped in Prague.
First time had like 8-9 hours to pass by, just wonder around.
Second time I had a full day and almost a full night.
It felt good and interesting, a place with a character, reminded me a bit of the vibe in Amsterdam,
A little bit freer, free smoke almost anywhere, culture mix as it happens in a place where it happens for a long time already.
Walking around at night, many people out in bars and clubs, music shows and a variety of meeting places.
An exiting feeling of a possible meeting is in the air in Prague.
I wanted to see a nightclub, one of those that got Prague some reputation.
I was going into a few that looked promising, but the promise did not fulfill.
I ended up making friends with a bartender named Jan, that denied his heart being hippie, but fed me with what he claimed to be the best rum in the world.
Left with a feeling of coming back to take a deeper look.
Christiania was created because of the lack of housing in Denmark in the late 60’s. Initially it was a military area, but in 1969 it had been abandoned. Between the years of 1969 and 1971, the tall fence surrounding the area was continuously broken into by hippies and squatters, who soon started to inhabit the empty military buildings. Around this time, an alternative newspaper published an article with a headline saying “Emigrate with bus number 8” and the article described the empty buildings, and suggested ideas for use- not least for living-space for the great number of young people that could not find anyhwere to live at the time. The result was a massive immigration of people who wanted to create another life based on communal living and freedom, and thus Christiania was born.
People from all walks of life come to visit Christiania, to have a break from the usual rush of the big-city and the sometimes cold lifestyle of the north. Immigrants, pensioners, single mothers, homeless and unemployed people all come here for a breather; street people and travellers, all find a sanctuary in Christiania. They come here to enjoy the peaceful, natural and wild environment, far from the structure of Northern European society, with its magical mixture of village and city life. Christiania is creative; filled with art, colours and grafitti- and welcomes everyone.
Christiania is probably most famous for its liberal view on cannabis-smoking. There are a few “laws” to Christiania which include no hard drugs and no weapons; but cannabis is used and sold openly everywhere. The people who founded Christiania was for the legalisation of cannabis, and this continues to be part of one of the main structures. At one point they tried; then, however, real problems started in Copenhagen, as the cannabis-business moved into the streets, was taken over by gangs, and became a very violent affair. Still, police come to Christiania several times a week, but the people who are selling cannabis around Pusher Street (the main cannabis-market) all know about this, and they pack up their things and run quickly.
The Christianites themselves live under a constant threat of possibly becoming homeless, should the government make reality of their plans to build luxury-apartments on the Christiania grounds. A young man called Thomas, who lived in Christiania for the past seven years, is a spokesman for the Christiania board. He says that he is not worried about this actually happening. “There are too many people who would protest, who would protect and help us. There would be riots on the streets of Copenhagen- and the government knows this.”
christiania, street love
christiana, parking spot..
christiana, house on the ice…
christiana, house on the ice…
“My first visit to Christiania was at the age of 16. I went with my best friend; we had heard of this place and were really excited to see and experience it. It was the middle of summer, and it was very, very hot. Everything was green and lush, and not many people were out on the streets- I guess they were all at the beach. We took the famous bus number 8 from central Copenhagen, and we were not really sure where to get off- and we were definitely too scared to ask anyone for directions. We did not want people to know what naughtiness we were about to do. Eventually we did get there, and we were amazed at what we saw. This other world opened up in front of us; scary in many ways, with all the men and boys standing around in Pusher Street, and really scary because of all the big dogs roaming around. At the same time, we felt happy, welcome- it was so relaxed, so different, such a chilled-out vibe. We went to one of the stalls and bought a minimal amount of weed- the smoking was our main objective for coming here- and then we sneaked away from the main , hid in the bushes, sat in the grass, and tried to roll a joint in the gentle summer-breeze. We felt as if we were doing something forbidden and were shocked when a black man with dreads walked past us, wearing round, pink sunglasses and a huge, bright smile, saying ´girls, no need to be ashamed, no need to hide! just be free and happy, you are allowed!´We looked at each other with huge, relieved smiles, and until this day, we’ll never forget the feeling of freedom this man with the incredible smile gave us. How different from our normal life!
Since this day, I have continued coming to Christiania year after year. Mostly I go in the summer, to chill out in the beergarden (and drink beer less than half the price of most places in Scandinavia!) and to get a break from the normal, hectic, busy and structured life of northern Europe. I don’t come for the smoking anymore- and actually, since I stopped coming simply for the reason to get stoned, I started discovering the beauty of this place. The creativity, the colours, the relaxed vibe- and just the general feeling of freedom, and being allowed. I’ve had some amazing food here- organic, vegetarian meals- and I’ve seen amazing art by the Tibetan population living here. I bring my bicycle, and cycle around the lake- I marvel at the weird and amazing houses and I feel alive, free, and refreshed after leaving the freetown and entering the EU again- where things are ridiculously priced, and people are always in a rush to get to wherever.”
more from linda on her blog:
Everybody said ‘Christiana’ is a cool place,
And still I was quite surprised to walk into it..
In the middle of what feels like a normal northern European town just across an almost hidden door, there is a wild imagination town alive and inspiring.
Like the bubble we create in our homes to have the feeling of freedom,
Christiana is a very big bubble, in the middle of life, creative and open, and festival party like organic happening.
I enjoyed it a lot, even though I was not really allowed to take pictures..
What you see is mostly the result of my Israeli manners…
I will definitely be back pronto in Christiana.
Sinai was great,
I am not sure in which moment it happened, but when I was having my last sunset café there, I realized I feel much more tuned then when I got there,
I got there after a hared time in ego land, too much thinking and expecting and being in the ‘I’.
Every place has a different quality like every person.
Sinai is a place where you find quietness, peacefulness.
I met a few people there that claimed to inlighted or as they said almost in lighted,
After a few days of silence with myself, I started talking to my fellow man,
There was a funny nice collection there; mainly couples in love or some like me that wanted a little time to run away.
There is nothing to do in Sinai..Maybe just breath.
Which is the most important thing,
My auntie went to the doctor to get checked and they told her she stops breathing 30 times in a minute…
Breathing needs to be continues.
And it happened to me, I breathe!
That is why I am,
That is why it is all-ok, ok in any case, even if ‘things’ don’t. Happen the way my ‘I’ wanted them to..
The revolution in Egypt and Sinai got to it’s climex for me by the shije saying one night that there is too much fire in the world right now, so we should not light the fire.
Need to say, that the ‘around the fire’ show every night is the only show in Sinai.
That and the stars.
So many of them.. Reminding us how small we are actually, and that we don’t meter as much as we think we do.
I feel so very much thankful that I can allow myself some time ‘off’ the concept of time.. Without a phone, or net, or anything that I reflect.
It reminds me that I am me, even without my ‘I’
Met a few new friends.. Some were my friends forever and I just met them..
Thank you gali, zohar, misu, siso.. And all.
Going there was going far away, by going far away. I’m coming closer☺
Tonight going to Prague, a day there and then to warmth land in cold Sweden.
I wish you all some breathe.
Love and warmth.
p.s. I posted around 70 moments here..i think you need to ‘click’ all the way down..
siso: ‘don’t play with fire’..
my new old soul friend..gali.
sinai dogy style..
the tonight show every night in sinai..
living on the water..
last sinai night..
my hill house..
me caza tu caza..
friends along the way..
revolution guard #39..
my opening door..
friday candle light.
siso ve simcho..
lunch at 1700.
my favorite tiger in sinai..
on the road.
this man touched me in his effort to make his place inviting for us..
black and yellow kid.
hassan my hair dresser.
made me realise how i long for touch 🙂
kid tuning radio for revolution news in nawiba..
desert town nawiba..
in focose !!
out of foc..
home away from home..
milion stars hotel..